Door Number 3

"Something should have worked by now. It's time to talk about your options."

Nobody ever wants to hear a doctor say that. In our case, it's about starting our family. After 2 1/2 years, we've reached our last ditch effort:

Invitro

I can't tell you all the emotions that come with that word but I'd have to say sadness is at the top. But hope is mixed in there too. If it weren't we wouldn't waste our time and money.

It wasn't supposed to be like this. We should have a toddler by now. Maybe even another on the way.

But we don't. What we do have is 3 options:

1. More invasive, out-of-pocket tests that may tell us why we aren't pregnant and they may find something they can fix.
2. Throw stronger drugs at it. We have had 3 failed IUIs that all looked beautiful on paper. We can get stronger drugs and throw more eggs at the problem but no guanantees.
3. Invitro: our odds at my age are 2 out of 3 (which sounds better than the actual percentage of 60%)

We've opted for door number 3. I figure if they are going to put me under anesthesia and charge me a small fortune, I'd rather wake up one step closer to pregnant.

We're giving ourselves a couple of months to relax, detox the hormones I've been on the last two cycles, and squirrel away everything we can to avoid debt.

I've decided to blog about the journey so that our kids know how much we wanted them and how much we're willing to go through to get them here. Writing is also therapeutic to me so that's a plus.

But beyond that, people just don't talk about infertility that much. So maybe someone can read this and know they aren't alone. I've relied heavily on the words of others who have gone through this and are going through it so maybe I can pay it forward.

We appreciate all the prayers so far and covet all the ones you can give us the next few months. Our tentative plan is to start meds in May so that gives you a timeline to pray about :).

-Michelle