So I just took the first step in taking this process from "something we're going to do" to something we are doing... like soon.
The first prescription is dropped off: birth control.
Yep. You read that right. For those of you unfamiliar with the invitro process (of course every clinic and case is different), the first step is a few days/weeks of birth control.
The reason is that they want to "reboot" your ovaries before getting into the drugs that stimulate them to make a whole bunch of eggs.
Even though I know why I'll be taking it, I can't really get over the irony that my first experience with birth control will be to get pregnant.
At this point I would stand on my head for 5 days if the doc told me to.
Oh and we may be moving this whole thing up a month instead of waiting until May. Even though it's nice to have a clear, un-hormonal head back on my shoulders, I'm just kind of ready to get the show on the road.
I have to be honest though- I'm not really looking forward to the whole pregnancy part. Part of me hopes I'll enjoy it but as many complaints as I hear from pregnant women, I'm not naive to think the hard part is going to be over once the test is finally positive.
But just like planning a wedding is just a means to the marriage, this whole process is a means to have our family with us. I'm so ready to sit down and plan out Disney World trips and preschool and all the museums and parks I want to show my kids and places we want to take them.
I can't take a road trip any more without flashbacks of what my childhood road trips were like and yearning for the screaming, cranky kids in the back. You know, the ones with my eyes and his hair.
I'm not even a mom yet but I already feel like I'd do anything for my (hopefully) future kids.
I mean nothing says love like being willing to take shots in the butt for someone. Am I right? ;)
Tuesday, March 25, 2014
Friday, March 14, 2014
Door Number 3
"Something should have worked by now. It's time to talk about your options."
Nobody ever wants to hear a doctor say that. In our case, it's about starting our family. After 2 1/2 years, we've reached our last ditch effort:
Invitro
I can't tell you all the emotions that come with that word but I'd have to say sadness is at the top. But hope is mixed in there too. If it weren't we wouldn't waste our time and money.
It wasn't supposed to be like this. We should have a toddler by now. Maybe even another on the way.
But we don't. What we do have is 3 options:
1. More invasive, out-of-pocket tests that may tell us why we aren't pregnant and they may find something they can fix.
2. Throw stronger drugs at it. We have had 3 failed IUIs that all looked beautiful on paper. We can get stronger drugs and throw more eggs at the problem but no guanantees.
3. Invitro: our odds at my age are 2 out of 3 (which sounds better than the actual percentage of 60%)
We've opted for door number 3. I figure if they are going to put me under anesthesia and charge me a small fortune, I'd rather wake up one step closer to pregnant.
We're giving ourselves a couple of months to relax, detox the hormones I've been on the last two cycles, and squirrel away everything we can to avoid debt.
I've decided to blog about the journey so that our kids know how much we wanted them and how much we're willing to go through to get them here. Writing is also therapeutic to me so that's a plus.
But beyond that, people just don't talk about infertility that much. So maybe someone can read this and know they aren't alone. I've relied heavily on the words of others who have gone through this and are going through it so maybe I can pay it forward.
We appreciate all the prayers so far and covet all the ones you can give us the next few months. Our tentative plan is to start meds in May so that gives you a timeline to pray about :).
-Michelle
Nobody ever wants to hear a doctor say that. In our case, it's about starting our family. After 2 1/2 years, we've reached our last ditch effort:
Invitro
I can't tell you all the emotions that come with that word but I'd have to say sadness is at the top. But hope is mixed in there too. If it weren't we wouldn't waste our time and money.
It wasn't supposed to be like this. We should have a toddler by now. Maybe even another on the way.
But we don't. What we do have is 3 options:
1. More invasive, out-of-pocket tests that may tell us why we aren't pregnant and they may find something they can fix.
2. Throw stronger drugs at it. We have had 3 failed IUIs that all looked beautiful on paper. We can get stronger drugs and throw more eggs at the problem but no guanantees.
3. Invitro: our odds at my age are 2 out of 3 (which sounds better than the actual percentage of 60%)
We've opted for door number 3. I figure if they are going to put me under anesthesia and charge me a small fortune, I'd rather wake up one step closer to pregnant.
We're giving ourselves a couple of months to relax, detox the hormones I've been on the last two cycles, and squirrel away everything we can to avoid debt.
I've decided to blog about the journey so that our kids know how much we wanted them and how much we're willing to go through to get them here. Writing is also therapeutic to me so that's a plus.
But beyond that, people just don't talk about infertility that much. So maybe someone can read this and know they aren't alone. I've relied heavily on the words of others who have gone through this and are going through it so maybe I can pay it forward.
We appreciate all the prayers so far and covet all the ones you can give us the next few months. Our tentative plan is to start meds in May so that gives you a timeline to pray about :).
-Michelle
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